Pick Me, Pick Me! CV Mistakes
Last updated: 16/10/2006 - 09:38
The following are all genuine fantastic - and funny - blunders applicants have put down on application forms and/or CVs/covering letters. Interviewers beware!
"I'm married with 9 children. I don't require prescription drugs."
"I am extremely loyal to my present firm, so please don't let them know of my immediate availability."
"I am a man filled with passion and integrity, and I can act on short notice. I'm a class act and do not come cheap."
"Here are my qualifications - for you to overlook."
"I intentionally omitted my salary history. I've made money and lost money. I've been rich and I've been poor. I prefer being rich."
"Please note: Please don't misconstrue my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job."
"40. That's 'Forty'."
"Often."
"Various."
"College, August 1880-May 1984".
"Dealing with customers' conflicts that arouse."
"Develop and recommend an annual operating expense fudget."
"I'm a rabid typist."
"Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain operation."
"Responsibility makes me nervous."
"They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn't work under those conditions."
"Was met with a string of broken promises and lies, as well as cockroaches."
"I was working for my mom until she decided to move."
"The company made me a scapegoat - just like my three previous employers."
"While I am open to the initial nature of an assignment, I am decidedly disposed that it be so oriented as to at least partially incorporate the experience enjoyed heretofore and that it be configured so as to ultimately lead to the application of more rarefied facets of financial management as the major sphere of responsibility."
"I was proud to win the 'Gregg Typting Award'."
"Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job."
"My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I have no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."
"I procrastinate - especially when the task is unpleasant."
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